Another Episode and the Last Concert

Yesterday was a pretty full day.

For me, it started with a list of errands to run, which is becoming increasingly difficult to do as my pregnancy goes on.  Due to where we live, when I go downtown for any reason, I always stop at more than one place. To go two different days is just a waste of gas.  But as my mom said to me after she heard my story, I am getting to the point where I need my own bodyguard.

Here was my list of errands:  post office, eye doctor, gas, grocery store for pit stop where laundry detergent was on sale, Walmart, and Lowe's, but only Lowe's if Walmart didn't have one thing I was looking for.  They didn't.

I always start off my errands feeling pretty good.  Yes, I eat breakfast.  However, Walmart is a big store, and yesterday, I just walked too much of it.  I had been looking for a couple of things I don't normally buy, and while I actually purchased less than normal, I spent a lot of time walking around.  I could feel my footsteps get heavier as my time in the store lengthened.  I waited on the checkout line, which was going particularly slowly, and when it was my turn at long last, I began to feel myself fading.  I know the feeling of lightheadedness all to well.  It comes on slowly, usually giving me time to take shelter in a chair or something, but when one is on a checkout line waiting to pay, that option isn't available.  I was getting weaker by the second, and I could feel the blood draining from my head.  I almost said the cashier, "Hurry and check me out before I pass out!" but decided against it.  She rang my items, all the while, completely oblivious to me actually leaning over the cart for support.  Even the people on line behind me were not paying attention.  I glanced around for a place to take refuge, and I saw a bench, unoccupied, by customer service.  Finally, she gave me my total, and I all but shoved the money her way, and she at last noticed my distress.  "Are you okay?  Do you need water?"

"I'm not feeling well.  I am pregnant.  I just need to get to that bench over there."

She finished the transaction, and I all but ran over to the bench (with my cart), and turned to notice her notifying another staff member about the crazy pregnant lady.  The other staff member came over to me, and got me a bottle of cold water (for which she wasn't interested in charging me- that was very kind), and another staff member came to me and said he hoped I wouldn't deliver there in Walmart.  (I guess that happened in a Walmart somewhere just last week!)  I assured him I still have seven weeks to go, and that I was just feeling lightheaded and it would soon pass.

It did.  I felt much better after only a couple of minutes, due to the chair and the water.  In fact, I didn't stay long.  I had one more stop to make, and I thought I had enough strength to make it home. When I did, I devoured lunch and took a long nap.  Needless to say, I was very glad to not have passed out in Walmart.

I couldn't nap as long as I may have wanted, however, because I had to make sure dinner was prepared early.  Brian had his March concert last night, and ever the good husband that he is to me, he came home to get me, instead of making me drive myself.  That does create an extra burden for him, and while I hate that, I am a terrible night driver, anywhere really, but especially on these rural roads here in PA/NY.  I wouldn't have him come and get me if I didn't think my very life was at risk due to my poor night driving skills.

It was a bit sad for me, because this is the last concert that I can probably attend for a while.  Brian and I will be very new parents by the time of the next concert in May, and it will most likely be a while before I can attend any of his concerts while I have a baby to care for.  It is also late for Baby to be out, and it is loud, so I'm not sure when we will be able to take our little one to see Daddy.  I'll have to play that one by ear.

When we were dating, I could only hear Brian describe his concerts.  Obviously, I could never go to even one, given the fact they were always in the middle of the week and I had my own teaching job in NJ.  Since we were married, I've been to five concerts now.  I'm always there with my camera, recording.  Last night, Brian was particularly entertaining as he had some faculty participate in one song, and he chose some very upbeat, well-known pieces.  While I am no musician, I thought his students were excellent, and Brian's direction superb.  For example, Brian sometimes starts concerts this way:  the students are already playing, and then he rolls the curtain back, and he's not even on the podium directing them!  He takes his time- calm, cool, and collected- and trusts their skills and ability to play without him conducting, at least for a minute or two.   Then he joins them, showing just who is in charge.  It always brings a smile to my face, and I am so terribly proud of him.

A couple of his colleagues asked me how I was feeling, and my response of, "Well, I almost passed out in Walmart today," made a good story.

I have no picture to post here, because while I took video, I didn't get any photos taken.  Just for fun, I'll include this photo of Brian dressed up for his concert this past December.  He basically looked the same last night, except he had a different tie.  He had very much the same smile on his face after it was over!

Still Recovering

It has been six days since the mouse incident, and I am still recovering.

Brian and I have been trying to determine if there are any more or if this was a freak appearance. The weather had been warm and then dropped sharply, so perhaps Mr. Mouse found an entrance into our warm abode to escape the cold.  Still, we don't want to be so naive as to think that this is a one-time incident.

After we placed cotton balls soaked in vinegar around the house, one strange thing happened that immediately made me upset.  One of the cotton balls that was just under the stove (you could see it, so it was only slightly underneath) was in front of the stove the next morning, and it was all puffed up.  Now, as the cotton balls were drying, they were all puffing up to some degree, but this one was abnormally large.  I immediately drew the conclusion that we had another mouse that pushed the cotton ball from the stove and pulled at the thing.  Proof?  I have none.  There were no droppings at all.  I just couldn't understand how the cotton ball would move and grow that fat on its own.

Thankfully, our brother-in-law, Chris, told us about these nifty mouse traps that are much better than the old-fashioned wooden ones I initially bought.  They are spin traps, and you place the peanut butter underneath, which is then covered, and you set the trap to the word "set".  The mouse is lured in, and then it says "caught".  You never have to see the body of the mouse.  You take the entire trap and throw it away.  Sounds like a trap made for someone like me!  The only good mouse is a dead mouse, but I don't want to see any mouse, alive or dead.

We spent Sunday afternoon and evening cleaning the entire kitchen.  We went through the cabinets and looked for any evidence of droppings or things being eaten.  We wiped each cabinet with white vinegar, and sprayed heartily.  We did not see any evidence of anything amiss.

I am currently keeping the vacuum plugged in and ready to go, so that I can quickly vacuum up any crumbs that drop on the floor as I am cooking.  I am wiping down surfaces with white vinegar after I prepare food as well.  I even washed my the outside of my peanut butter jar so as to wipe away scent and hopefully not lure the creepy things in.

We did place the nifty spin trap in the kitchen, by the stove where we had seen the cotton ball "move".  We've had it there two nights, but so far, nothing's been caught.  I keep looking at the thing like it is some kind of ticking time bomb.  It is sort of creeping me out just having it there, as if the peanut butter inside is going to call every mouse within a five mile radius.

I am still not fully relaxed.  Brian is wondering when I'll stop keeping the towel underneath our bedroom door.  Oh, I'm not completely stupid.  I know a mouse can get in other ways, but since this one was in our living room, I feel compelled to block off that way into our bedroom.

We are still planning to get a cat, perhaps even looking into it as early as next week.  Brian has many times tried to talk me into getting a cat, and I always told him, "Don't ask me unless we have a mouse.  Otherwise I don't want one."  Well, we did have a mouse.  And the fact is, we could have another.  I don't want to sit around waiting for the other shoe to drop.  From what I read online, no house is completely safe.  There is always an entry way for a mouse.  I had always thought that only gross city apartment buildings had such rodents, but I have since learned that is not the case. Our home is clean, but it is also warm, which is a temptation for these rodents on a cold day.  I have never had a mouse in any of the homes I've lived in prior, but I have also never lived so far into the woods as we are here.

I'd rather get the cat now, so that I don't have to worry about stepping out of our bedroom in the middle of the night.  What if our baby is crying, and I want to walk around the living room while Brian is sleeping?  I'm not naive enough to suggest we will never have a mouse again, even with a cat, but I know a cat will be a help.  A detective, if you will.  A security guard.  A night-prowler to listen for sounds and sniff the air, so I can concentrate on other things, like our baby.

It will be an adjustment for me to live with an animal.  I've never had a pet, and cats move fast and their movements often startle me.  As I said to my mom, however, I'd much rather get used to living with a cat, then never get used to wondering when a mouse is going to fly out from nowhere as it did the other night, or wonder if my food is going to be eaten.  I may not love this cat as affectionately as Brian will, but if it helps keep our home safe, I will love it in my own way.

So, though it may sound silly, we are currently praying for the right cat to join our home.  Some of our criteria:  it must be short-haired, of course friendly, somewhat independent (it won't get attention from me all day long because my main concern will be our baby), and hopefully it will be a good mouser.  Brian already knows (and we established this long ago when we talked about "if" we ever got a cat) that he will be responsible for the kitty litter, clean up, and vet trips.  I am simply not an animal person.  I am not saying I will never help out, but I already take care of every aspect of cleaning the home.  He can handle this one.

For now, I am still looking around everywhere I go for any evidence of anything, and I'm still not fully comfortable.  I think when we get a cat, I will begin to relax.  Hopefully.

Not a Creature Was Stirring...

Oh, but unfortunately, there was.

Brian and I encountered a mouse.

I'll pause while you pick yourself up off the floor.

Of all the horrific things, I thought spiders were pretty bad.  I found out they are nothing in comparison to a mouse.  Do let me tell the story.

Two nights ago, I was getting ready for bed.  Brian was still in the living room, sitting on the floor and going over music he is teaching.  I had just headed to the bedroom, AFTER BEING IN THE LIVING ROOM FOR HOURS, and I was just settling my brain with the Bradley Method and then a long winter's nap.

Brian called out to me, "Bear," sort of long and drawn out, with hesitancy in his voice.  (Our affectionate nickname for each other is "Bear".)

I said, "Yeah?" awaiting with dread that there was news of a huge spider.

"We have a mouse.  For real."

I'm not sure there are words to express the shock and horror that came upon me at that moment. What did you say?  Here, in our house?  In our home?  In the place I usually find comfort and serenity?

At first, I was frozen.  I thought it would magically disappear or that Brian would just as magically make it go away.  Still talking in separate rooms, he informed me it ran into the kitchen (our kitchen, dining, and living room are an open floor plan).  I kept thinking, the kitchen isn't big, surely we can find it, but Brian said it was hiding.  I had a lot to learn about a mouse.

I slowly crept out of the bedroom.  What I really wanted to do was grab my things, jump into the car with Brian, and drive to the motel in downtown Milford, and call an exterminator in the morning.  But no.  I knew I had to at least see what we could do.  We didn't have any traps.  We did have some mice poison on hand just in case, so Brian retrieved it from the closet downstairs and sprinkled that around, but would it eat it?

The answer is, no, it did not.

We tried to come up with a plan.  At first, Brian said perhaps he could chase it down the stairs through the front door.  He tried doing that with the vacuum (by this time the mouse ran out from the kitchen and underneath the love seat), while I held open the front door.  While I was doing that, the mouse ran into the panel underneath the fireplace.  At first, Brian thought we could fry the thing, but I reminded him that it is quite safe in the panel; it isn't actually the fireplace.  What to do?  The mouse kept peaking out, and Brian kept turning on the vacuum each time so as to scare it and keep it in there.

It was just about ten when this started, and the time was slowly creeping later and later.  Poor Brian needed to get to sleep if he wanted to get up at 5:30.  We were almost about to prepare for bed, because we didn't know what to do.  Obviously the mouse wanted out, and as soon as we were gone this thing would run all over.  Horrors!  I just couldn't take it.  It did run out a few times, and Brian again scared it with the vacuum, and it kept running straight back into the fireplace panel.

Finally I said, "What if we could somehow get it out the sliding glass door?"

Brian thought it was a great idea.  He went and opened it wide, and then we tried to figure out how in the world we could corral this fast moving critter out that door.  When it left the fireplace, it kept running along the wall, but we wanted it to go the other way.  Finally, we stood guard, each armed with a weapon.  Brian had the vacuum and the broom on the side where the mouse kept coming out, and I stood in the center of the room with our little emergency snow shovel.  What I was going to do with it, I didn't know, but I certainly felt better holding it.

(Before all of this, I took the time to empty my Lazy Susan cabinet of all food items that the mouse might get into and put them into cabinets higher up.  I also put a towel under our bedroom door and a rug under Baby's room, where I have quite a few things already.  Brian and I also donned shoes for battle.)

At first, Brian tried to scare the thing to come out.  We realized that wouldn't work.  Then we decided to just be quiet.  And we prayed.  I told our Almighty God that Jesus sent the demons into the pigs and off of a cliff, so surely this would be nothing, and I asked for some heavenly help.  We waited. We watched.  I had to grab a kitchen stool to sit on because my pregnant body was killing me from all the stress.  Finally, the mouse flew out in the direction we wanted.  Yes!  But no!  Instead of going straight out the door, it veered left into the kitchen again, sort of in a niche under the dishwasher.  We sprung into action.  I went to the left side of the counter with my trusty shovel and started banging the floor (it seemed like a good idea), while Brian got the right side with the vacuum and broom.  Brian warned me to back up because if the mouse sprung out suddenly, he knew I'd be scared.  Good thinking!

We ended up switching places, and the mouse ran underneath the stove, further away from the door. Then it ran under the fridge, again, further away.  Brian stood guard and refused to let the thing past, so the mouse had no where to go but the direction we wanted it.  It ran toward the sliding glass door, but went behind the garbage can instead.  It was so close!  After a breathless moment, it finally leaped out the door.  I shouted to Brian, "Shut the door!" since he was closer.  He shut it, locked it, and made sure it was good and tight.  I put my shovel down and we collapsed in each other's arms, weary, relieved, and exhausted.  By the time it was over, it was almost one o'clock in the morning.

I could hardly sleep that night, and we were both exhausted yesterday.  I still am creeped out, to say the least.  We live in the woods now, and this was the first time I had ever seen a live mouse, except for college biology when my professor fed a live mouse to the caged snake.

To say that I am still scared is the understatement of the century.  I keep looking around everywhere I go.  We have put vinegar-soaked cotton balls all around the house, because we read mice hate the smell of vinegar, and we are seriously discussing getting a cat.  I have never had a  pet except for a fish, but Brian loves cats, so at least one of us would love the thing.  (I will try my best.)  We are currently researching what cats are good mousers.

So that's the drama in our lives right now.  I need to catch up on chores, because I left the house yesterday to go over a friend's.  (No way was I sitting here all day alone.)

We will do what we can to make sure our home is safe for our little one coming in less than two months.  If a cat is the answer, I'm willing.

Our family size may be growing more than we thought!  Stay tuned.

In About Two Months

Two months from yesterday is my due date.  To think that Brian and I will soon be holding our baby has me so excited!  I thought I'd write a little post about all the things I am looking forward to.

Of course, it goes without saying, I am simply looking forward to seeing my baby, holding my baby, kissing my baby's face, etc., etc., etc.  I can't wait to pick up my little one from a nap, and seeing his/her legs all curled up, looking adorable in a onesie.

But let's get to some of the other things I am looking forward to, that are, shall we say, more shallow?  Hey, I don't think I need to defend myself here.  A pregnant woman greatly looks forward to returning to normalcy again.  Here are some of those things, in no real order of importance:

1.  Sleeping/rolling over in bed without worry that I'll harm, squish, or cut off the blood flow to Baby.  (I am so weary of sleeping on my side and the tiredness it causes in my legs and hips.)
2.  Someday returning to my former size... whenever that might be.  In any case, I am ready to be done with maternity clothes. (Though I have to thank my sister, because it is all of her hand-me-downs that I am wearing these days.  Three cheers for an older sister who has been pregnant three times, and saved her clothes for me instead of just dumping them when she was done!)
3.  No more lightheadedness, odd pains, and overall discomfort.
4.  There are quite a few things in the food/drink department I am quite ready for.  Brian says he will get me a coke before we leave the hospital.  (I used to be somewhat addicted to coca cola, but since Brian hated me drinking something so unhealthy, I gave it up when we were married.  I would only have a coke if we were out to dinner or something.  Of course, pregnant, I haven't had it at all.  I am just looking forward to one glass.)
5.  Drinking a latte.
6.  Deli meats.  My mom and dad will be bringing me up a sub from Jersey Mike's after the baby arrives.  Yum!  These are some of the things to focus on during labor!
7.  Drinking coffee once in a while.  I'm not a huge coffee drinker, but I do like it here and there, with sugar and vanilla creamer to sweeten it up.  Of course, while breast feeding, a mother still has to watch her caffeine intake, but one cup a week, for example, will be all right.
8.  Having a bounce in my step again.
9.  Putting all the worries that go along with labor and delivery behind me.

While this one doesn't really fit the list in the same way, I am greatly looking forward to my mother's visit after the baby arrives.  She will be taking a week off of work to come and help me, not just with the baby, but with house work as well.  She did the same for my sister.  In fact, I remember when my sister first brought Emily home from the hospital, she was changing her out of her outfit for the first time, and Emily was crying and making a fuss.  My sister called out, "Mom, help me!"  (I'd like to add that after four kids, my sister no longer needs such help.)  I made a mental note that day that I, too, would have my mom around when I stepped into motherhood.  My mom is such a trooper, and I know she'll do laundry for me, and whatever else needs to be done so I can relax a little.  A girl simply has to have her mamma around, when she becomes a mamma herself!

So those are a few things I am looking forward to.  In the meantime, however, I am busy around here, continuing to organize and make things ready.  This baby will be here soon enough!

30 Weeks

I am now at thirty weeks.  Crazy, right?  Just before Christmas, I was at twenty weeks, and to think that ten weeks have just gone by makes my head spin.  There are only ten weeks to go, give or take when Baby actually decides it is time to delight Brian and me with his/her entrance into our world.

I have long since developed the ever-graceful pregnancy waddle.  New pains pop up here and there, including a ridiculously severe pain in my left heel.  Since I don't normally have any problems in that quarter, I'm guessing that due to the extra weight, my body is retaliating against me.  Sleeping is becoming a chore.  I long for regular clothes again, and while I was skinny just this past August and September, I wonder if I will ever be again!

Along with the third trimester, comes the insatiable nesting factor.  For me, it isn't just about organizing the baby's room.  I'm trying to organize every room and everything that we haven't already done since we moved.  I'm going through all the closets and reorganizing them, and I have a pile of things that I need to look through to decide what to keep and toss.  The baby's room is sort of on hold, because my old bedroom furniture, which will be the baby's, is in the garage, so we'll wait to get that out for now.  I won't have a crib until after the baby gets here, so there is just not much I can do in that area.  For now, I have to organize Baby's things without drawers and do the best I can.

Last week, I was sitting in the eye doctor's office, and a little girl of three years old took a liking to me and sat beside me.  I had my winter coat unzipped and my hand on my belly.  This little girl's father walked into the room and said, "Oh, a mother-to-be, getting some practice!"  It was the FIRST time anyone in public has recognized me as being pregnant without me mentioning it, no doubt due to the giveaway hand on my belly.  Normally my winter coat has me well concealed.  Then another, older lady came out of the exam room, looked at this man's children, and lamented that her kids were all grown.  She was wishing they were still small.  I took it all in, and while I don't think she realized I was pregnant, she caused me to pause and think how quickly we move through life. Someday I will remember, perhaps twenty years from now, this moment in the eye doctor's office, when I was on the threshold of the birth of my first child, with all the joyful anticipation my heart could hold.  I know that some of the best moments of our lives await me and Brian... those first few moments of holding our baby in our arms.  How wonderful!

Mother's Day

Well, yes, I'm writing about Mother's Day while it is only February.

I'm due on Monday, May 6.  Mother's Day is Sunday, May 12.  So I will either be a mother on Mother's Day or I will have just missed it.  In which case I will be very disappointed.  (Sentence fragment used on purpose.)  I have already instructed Brian that I expect a Mother's Day card whether I have delivered or not.

Thinking about the above, for me at least, begs the question, when does a mother become a mother?  (The same works for father as well.)  Is it at the moment of conception, or does it occur when the baby is actually born?  Or is it somewhere along the way?

The phrases that go along with pregnancy seem to answer the question.  "Expecting parents", "parents-to-be", etc., implying that "No, you're not a parent yet, but soon."  While I would agree with that, there is a part of me that already feels very much like a mother, because while my child is in my womb, there are decisions that I make daily in regards to his/her well-being.

I think of a moment back in December, right before Christmas, when I fell down the stairs.  Of course, this being my first pregnancy, I tend to worry about everything.  The idea that falling when pregnant immediately results in calamity is mostly myth, but it is a very powerful myth regardless.  I don't think I'll ever forget how I felt in those few seconds of time.  First of all, I hadn't fallen down the stairs since I was a child.  How it happened, I'm not sure, but I found myself slipping, both feet in the air, wondering how in the world I would land.  I remember purposely thrusting my knees forward, trying desperately to avoid my abdomen.  Brian was at the bottom of the stairs and caught my upper body in his arms as my knees crashed to the floor, my legs tucked awkwardly in back of me.  I burst into tears and cried out, "The baby!"  He held me as I sobbed, wondering, too, if all would be well with our precious babe.

I can say that at that moment, we felt every bit the full-fledged parents.  As it turned out, perhaps we needn't have worried quite so much, as falling is rather common during pregnancy, but we didn't know.  All we knew then was we loved this child already, and we didn't want any harm to come to our little one.

So yes, I agree that I am a "mom-to-be", but I would have to add that I am also a mom.  Perhaps I'm not a full-fledged one yet, but I think that loving this baby makes me a mother.  When Brian puts his head near my stomach and says, "Hi Baby, it's Daddy!", he is a father, too.  While we have a lot to learn, I'd like to think we are in the beginning stages of our journey already as parents.

And for the record, I really hope I am a mother, officially, by Mother's Day.

Surprise Shower

Today, my church surprised me with a shower.  To say that I was stunned, and a little bit embarrassed to be in the spotlight, is an understatement.  But what a blessing!

On the fourth Sunday of each month, our church has a potluck communion service, where the entire service is gathered around the table instead of a normal service in the sanctuary.  The women had wanted to throw the shower next month, but since I'll be at home then at my "other" shower (exactly one month from today!), they decided they'd rather do it now instead of wait until April.  (You never know when a baby will come early.)  So they checked with Brian and made sure we'd be there this week, and he didn't breathe a word of the whole affair.

We had eaten our meals, and dessert was brought out.  I noticed a young man carrying a rather large chair to the back of the room, and I thought to myself, "I wonder what he's doing with that." Soon after, the church secretary came to me and took my hand, and beckoned me to come with her.  I saw some yellow wrapping paper and balloons, and at first I thought, this must be a surprise for me and the other pregnant lady, due with her third child, in May.  It turned out this shower was just for me.

Brian and I were blessed beyond words.  I was embarrassed to say the least, but in a good way.  It's funny how I could teach in front of thirty students at a time, but that was so much different.  Being in front of people in a spotlight sort of way is always a bit unnerving to me.  This was the thing I disliked about our wedding day!  

I think what blessed us most today was the thoughtfulness of everyone there.  Our church is a rather small church, and a shower was the last thing I expected.  In fact, I don't think any of the churches I used to go to threw showers.  Babies were a pretty regular thing because they were bigger churches, so it would have been difficult to throw showers for everyone.  Brian and I were so touched because neither one of us has family that lives close by, and the shower today was so meaningful to us for that reason.  Instead of feeling on our own here in PA, our church was kind enough to reach out to us and share in our joy.  It is something we won't be forgetting any time soon.