Why Is Slowing Down So Hard?

Well, hello.

It's been a while.

I truly have missed writing here.  I have missed my little space in this big blogging world.  Most of all, I have missed pouring out my heart and filling empty, white space with letters and words.

It's late, so I will keep this short.  Suffice it to say, I am still having seizures.  The boys are still having their many developmental delays.  My heart still breaks when I think about how behind they are, and inside I truly do ache over it.  I am doing everything in my power to help them.  Not the least of which is to revamp our entire diet.

I thought we ate reasonably healthy before, but I realize now I had no clue.  We are now doing the GAPS (Gut and Psychology Syndrome) Diet, which is a very strict diet intended to heal the gut, and when the gut is healed, the brain follows.   The boys and I need this.  Months ago, I found out I have Candida (yeast in the gut), and this very well could be causing my seizures.  The mother's gut flora gets passed on to her babies, and so my boys received the lovely present from me, and in turn, they are having developmental delays.  This is what I have pieced together, though no doctor has told me this, because, what good are traditional medical doctors today?  Excuse me for saying so.  Give me someone who practices homeopathy or holistic methods or even herbal remedies.

So now, we drink broth with every meal.  We eat tons of meat and veggies.  We consume no sugar except honey and what already exists in fruit and dates.  I make EVERYTHING from scratch.  The only thing we eat out of a package is an occasional Larabar.  There is a long list of things we cannot eat, such as potatoes and corn.  Celtic sea salt is healthy and good for you, and that is added to meats liberally.  Even lard from healthy animals, raised the way God intended, is good for you.  We buy our meats straight from a farm, and while we are spending more money on food than we ever  have before, we are getting good, quality meat and eggs.

It is a lot of work.  I spend more time in the kitchen than I truly want, and sometimes, I'd rather be on the floor with the boys.  But even when it FEELS like I am ignoring them for prepping food, I have to remember that what I am doing is for all of us.

I cannot expect God to bring healing to the boys if I am not willing to start at the beginning.  This diet was so hard at first, and I DID not want to do it, but I did, and I believe it is the right course for us at this time.  Dr. Natasha Campbell-McBride invented the diet, and she used it to cure her son of autism.  I pray this diet will bring healing to my boys as well, and me, too, of my seizures.

I will be back to write again, hopefully.  There is so much my heart longs to say.  But I have to start somewhere.

Until then.

With You Always by Jody Hedlund

Before I begin this post, I want to say that I have taken an unplanned blogging break, mainly for one reason. Silas is my little boy stalker, and he is so clingy, that I can barely breathe.  Sitting down and typing up blogs is almost impossible in my world at present, because he is all over me, all the time.  I do miss writing here, and I hope to get back to this at some point.  My heart longs to write... but when you become a mother, many of your passions take a back seat.  I am even reading much less these days, which greatly saddens me.  I hope this is just a season.

On to my book review!

Two people come together from totally different worlds and discover that maybe being different is the best thing!

Elise Neumann is a poor immigrant struggling to keep her family together. Fresh from the streets of NYC, she only has any shelter at all because of a Christian worker's generosity. Her garments are threadbare, and her stomach knows what it is to be hungry.

Thornton Quincy, on the other hand, knows no financial hardship. The son of a very successful businessman, Thornton has been raised with every advantage. Yet, even growing up with all sorts of privileges, Thornton is not without a heart.

That heart is put to the test when trying to build a town, all while meeting the challenges of a contest his father has established for him and his brother. Elise, one of his employees, helps him to consider the needs of others, and he finds himself thinking more about those needs, and less about beating his brother in the contest.

While love between them develops, there is no way it can work. Elise is not the kind of woman Thornton's father would approve of, or is she?

I really liked reading about the life of fictional Elise. Her life was far from perfect, and at times, it is good as a reader to get out of my comfort zone and step into someone else's shoes. I liked learning about the conditions in the city that led immigrants, specifically women, heading west in desperation, often leaving their families behind in hopes of sending them funds in time. Jody Hedlund wrote this book with the true life incidents of September 1857 in mind, as women headed west on the "orphan trains" to seek work where cheap labor was sought. I enjoyed this bit of history.

Elise learns that God really was with her always, even on the dark days. I'm thankful when a book reminds me of that. It is a lesson that can't be learned enough. Jody weaved together another beautiful story!

*I received this book from Bethany House Publishers and was required to write a review.

Never Forget by Jody Hedlund

Misinformation spins out-of-control and becomes a web of deceit, taking on spirals and turns that no one saw coming.

Abbie is a devoted granddaughter to her grandfather who suffers from dementia. She must run the lighthouse, because his days of being able to are pretty much gone. Abbie would do anything to help him, and her love for him knows no bounds.

Nathaniel's life has been filled with money, women, booze, and careless living. When Abbie saves him after his boat capsizes, his memory is gone. Her grandfather mistakenly thinks he is her dead husband, and Nathaniel overhears their conversation just as he is waking up. Abbie, knowing how prone her grandfather is to temper tantrums, lets him believe that this stranger is her husband, so Nathaniel believes they are married.

While Abbie knows it is wrong to deceive Nathaniel, she sees how much her grandfather likes him. Nathaniel's presence is a balm to him. She also knows having a husband will protect her position as keeper of the lighthouse. So Abbie thinks she'll let the deceit go just a little bit longer...

Meanwhile, Nathaniel is mesmerized by this beautiful woman whom he thinks is his bride. He can't remember his past, but he has a feeling he wasn't a great guy. He determines to win her and woo her, be a better man, and have a new start. While Abbie knows the truth, she can't help but admire this man who tries so hard to please her.

But we all know that the truth must come out eventually. How will Nathaniel react? How can his rich, fancy world mesh with Abbie's? Will he forgive her? Will both of their pasts come back to haunt them?

Jody does a great job showing how two people realize they are sinners in need of God's forgiveness. She shows how no matter the sin, we can all have a fresh start.  This is one of Jody's strengths as a writer, and I see this theme through many of her books, though the journeys of the characters are completely different. She also describes the characters receiving the contentment from the Lord alone, apart from the person they love so much.

I like Jody's writing style. She pays great attention to detail, especially with physical description. She has a wonderful way of writing about the ever changing range of characters' emotions.

I do think she sometimes writes a bit too much description as far as physical affection, because in my opinion, in the world we live in today, we don't need to stoke the flames any further. I thought some of the flirting at the end, while not inappropriate at all, was a bit overboard.  However, that is just my opinion, and Jody is still a wonderful writer. She clearly has done her research on lighthouses and settings!

A quick note on the cover:  That is Jody's daughter!  I recently read a blog post of Jody's, and she described the process for making the cover.  Normally, professional models are chosen for covers of books, but her twin daughters were graduating high school and having a photo shoot, right on the water.  After their regular photos were taken, both girls wore borrowed period dresses, and a batch of photos was sent to the publishing team.  This photo was chosen!  Jody is quite proud, to say the least.  You can read her story here:  http://inspiredbylifeandfiction.com/something-very-special-about-the-cover-of-my-new-book/