Bargain Shopping

Anyone (and I mean anyone!) who knows me beyond the superficial knows that I love to shop for bargains.  I don't just mean sales here.  I mean prices that are akin to thrift store prices, except that the item is brand new.  I want to feel like I'm stealing the item, but without doing so, of course. Everything needs to be perfectly legal.

Before I was married and when I was a working woman, I found bargains pretty regularly.  This was due to several factors.  1)  I lived in an area where I was never at a loss for a store or a mall.  There were three malls within reasonable driving distance, and if I wanted to go to Kohl's or Target, there were several of those, too.  2)  I earned an income of my own (but let me add that I was ALWAYS careful about spending money).  3)  As a teacher standing in front of many students each day, I liked to make sure I was carefully groomed, with a little style thrown in.  I always felt like if these poor kids have to look at me for forty minutes at a time, I might as well look interesting.  (My feelings on fashion, and fashion for the Christian woman, would be a whole other blog post.)

I developed a rule that a product had to be under $10 in order for me to purchase it, shoes included. The only exception I would make was if I needed something specific that I couldn't find in that price range, but I rarely needed to break that rule.  I really never had a problem finding things under $10. In fact, some of my favorite shoes cost only $4.

My coworkers and students alike (well, mostly the female students) enjoyed hearing about my bargains, and often many reported to me when they scored a good deal.  My own family stands in awe of the deals I find, but it doesn't take a stroke of genius or luck.  It is a simple, no-nonsense approach that refuses to compromise.

Last Friday, I had planned a trip to Kohl's to shop for Brian's birthday.  I was excited to get out of the house with Caleb and make a killing, something I don't get to do too much these days.

Side note:  It still is an adjustment shopping with a baby.  Wheeling a bulky stroller around is not easy, and poor Caleb was bumped into many a rack.  (Thankfully, his car seat carrier keeps him well-protected.)  It's a struggle to hold several items while pushing the stroller, but I am not easily defeated when it comes to shopping.

This was a shopping trip for Brian, but I never can resist the chance to stop by the women's clearance shoe section.  That was my first stop, but in my defense, the doors were right by the women's shoe department.  As I scoured the racks looking for a good deal, I was at first disappointed.  Most of the so-called bargains were not bargains at all, with many items still in the $20 range.  I was about to give up and move on as I approached the bottom shelf of the very last rack.  This is what I saw:

Eddie Bauer boots in my size, 90% off?!  Sign me up!  To boot (no pun intended), I had a 30% coupon, thus bringing the $109.99 boots down to $7.70.  (And no, there was not a thing wrong with them!)  I am looking forward to wearing them, because they are super-comfortable (something my post-partum feet definitely crave), and I am guessing warm (something desperately needed here during these Pocono winters).

I proceeded to the men's department where I continued to score some more great deals, including three items for Brian that were also 90% off.  I can't go into details here, folks.  It isn't his birthday until Thursday.

I don't get out much to shop these days, but I was glad good deals were waiting for me!

Oh, and of course you want to see the boots:

Note To Self: Lighten Up!

Sometimes I am simply too hard on myself.

I wish I were the world's most put together woman, with the most put together home, and who takes care of and entertains her baby while making it look so easy.

The truth is, however, it is hard.  (And you are saying- you have it easy.  You only have one child.  I would agree, yes, it is nothing compared to my sister, who has four.)  Regardless, caring for a baby is hard work, and sometimes exhausting.  If I look at the things in my home that I STILL need to get to, instead of all the things I have done, it would be easy to get discouraged.  I'll admit that I do that. I often beat myself up for the one or two things I didn't get to on my "to do" list for the day.

Then, I try to get a hold of myself.  Sure, I am still waiting to find the perfect time to reorganize my kitchen cabinets, and the go-getter in me can get really hung up on stuff like that.  So instead, I look at this little guy:

I have brief pep talks with myself, that go something like this, "Courtney, every day you get to look into the face of this adorable cutie.  Who cares that the garage needs to be reorganized?  If that's the worst problem you have, you don't have any."

There you have it.  I am trying to lighten up, to not be so hard on myself.  I can be a pretty tough boss to work for, and I am my own boss!  I should really learn to treat my employees better.

I am so glad that I have Caleb's giggles to make me see the light of day.  He's way more important than kitchen cabinets.

* The above photo was taken at the end of August.  I am sadly behind on uploading my pics, and I just came across this and thought he looked so cute.

Four Months Old

Dear Caleb,

If I smile more these days, if I laugh just a little bit louder, if the light is brighter in my eyes, it is all because of you.

Before I became a mother, I always knew I'd love my child through and through.  I knew that even as a little girl playing with dolls.  It is an entirely different thing, however, when that love becomes REAL. I look at your sweet face and I wonder if you know you are loved.  I'm not sure all of what a baby at four months can or cannot comprehend, but I believe somewhere in that developing mind of yours, you understand you are loved.  Your smiles tell me so.

And your giggles!  Goodness!  How you dearly love to laugh!  Daddy and I are able to get you to laugh pretty easily these days.  I love to pick you up and rub my head against your belly.  That's my favorite way to make you giggle.  Truly, I'm not sure there are too many things more pleasing to my ears than that wonderful sound.

I'm so thankful that your daddy allows me to be a stay-at-home mom.  I could never go to work and part with you, leaving you to someone else's care.  You are mine.  One of the first things your daddy and I learned about each other was that we both believed in homeschooling our children.  That is another thing I am so thankful for.  You will be my companion for a good eighteen years.  I hope you are up for it!  I know I am.  I so look forward to teaching you, and not only that, but learning with you, too.

There are moments when I look at you and I try to freeze the picture in my mind.  I am all too aware that if I turn my back for one moment, you'll be all grown, a man ready to take on the world.

My sweet son, I love you more than I can say.  While I want you to grow to be big and strong, today I am relishing the fact that you're a baby who needs his mama.  Being your mother is the best job I've ever had.

Happy four months old, my Caleb-Bear!

Love always,
Your mama

Happy Caleb!

Sleepy Caleb, because he's a not a such a good napper and he missed his last nap.

Superhero Caleb.

Learning to Balance

I'm finding that motherhood is a balancing act in many ways; I'll write about two of them here.

Caleb is not a good napper.  The age-old debate to "let them cry" or not, is one Brian and I have discussed at length.  Pre-parenthood, I always believed in letting them cry.  I know it is what my parents did, and I figured that running to your child's every cry would spoil them.

Then I became a mom, and I learned that is a lot and I mean A LOT harder hearing your baby cry than I thought.  I still agree with the above, that running to your child's every cry is spoiling them, and just plain impossible, but I am learning the delicate balance.

After reading another viewpoint in one of my various parenting books (all handed down to me from my wonderful sister- this one happens to be about breastfeeding), which says that ignoring your baby's cries leads them to feeling neglected.  The very next day I wouldn't let him go.  But he still couldn't fall asleep, not even with all my singing, moving, etc.  Finally, Brian cried out, "Can't we do a combination of the two?"  It was our big "ah ha" moment.  Yes, perhaps it didn't have to be completely one and none of the other.

So I am learning.  Caleb struggles to fall asleep, and sometimes he simply needs help.  When he is struggling, I do not believe it is spoiling him to help him, unless I overdo it.  At these times, I do walk around and sing to him, and then I attempt to put him down.  If he still struggles, I've pretty much done all I can do, except maybe give him a reassuring stroke or two.  I am trying to show him the balance of "I love you; I am here for you, but I can't take away your tiredness or make you go to sleep.  Mama is always here watching over you as you learn and grow".

Another way I am learning to balance is by handling the demands of both a baby and a house.  It's hard staying on top of housework with a small baby, and a baby that doesn't nap well.  Do you think I have an hour here and there to get stuff done while Caleb is down for a nap?  Nope!  He often times is down for fifteen or twenty minutes.  It isn't even enough time for me to put my head down and get a sufficient nap, because the first five minutes I'm usually making sure he is good and out.  (The very best naps, which don't happen too often, are when he falls asleep in my arms after nursing, and I put my head back and we both sleep together.  Bliss!)

As Brian has just gone off back to work, I am trying to simplify the way I do things, and not take on too much.  My mom, sister, and I are the exact same way.  We are doers.  We want to get things done.  We cannot stand piled up laundry (due to which, there never is any in our houses) or our homes being dirty.  As I told my mom last week, things on my "to do" list haunt me until I get them done.

However, everything changes when there is a baby to care for.  He simply comes first.  So while he is at this tender age, I am trying to stay on top of the main things:  cooking, laundry, and keeping the main living areas clean, and I'm realizing it is simply not time to go clean out the garage.  Things like that will simply have to wait.  Am I okay with it?  Perhaps not, but I am learning to be.

I am far from the best mother out there, or the best housewife.  At the end of the day, I need to ask myself, "Have I loved my husband today?  Have I loved my son?"  If I can say yes, then it doesn't matter so much that the living room still needs to be straightened.  Honestly, when I hear Caleb giggle, there's not much else that matters in the world at that moment.  Not even the laundry.

So Long, Summer

August isn't even cold in its grave, and the stores swiftly began displaying pumpkins and mums for sale.  Goodness.  Please don't add salt to our already aching wounds.  No need to rub it in, folks.

Please don't misunderstand.  I love fall.  I really enjoy all the seasons, but I like the crispness of fall when it is cool enough for a jacket but not cold enough to shiver into an ice sculpture.  I am always ready to say goodbye to shorts, capris, and sandals and slip instead into my favorite pair of jeans. (Not sure I can get into them yet, with a few extra pregnancy pounds, but that's another story.)

I enjoy summer most of all because I get to spend it with my best friend.  For those that think teachers have it made in the shade, they don't see how hard my husband works.  Teaching is already like working two jobs with all the extra work at home, and my husband really does work two jobs.  So it is easily like working three jobs.  As a music teacher, he has so many extra activities, concerts, competitions, judging, school play, etc., etc., etc.  You get the picture.

I don't mean to sound "woe is me" when he is the one doing all that hard work.  But it does get lonely sometimes.  My mom and sister certainly can't drop in for a quick visit and chat over a cup of tea.  I can handle the regular hours Brian is away.  It is the second job and the added activities that make it difficult some days.  I miss him.  Now, with taking care of a baby, sometimes an extra set of eyes to watch our precious one is most welcome when trying to get a meal on the table.  (I won't even talk about how the kitten gets into EVERYTHING.)

So summer is over, but it has left us with some memories.  We watched our Caleb boy grow to three and half months old, and he delighted us a few days ago by rolling over FIVE times in one day!  He is no puny boy, that's for sure!  He's already a tough little guy, and as soon as I can get him to help me carry the groceries in, I will!

After a second close encounter with a mouse, we brought home a kitten, and while I am still trying to get used to the little guy, Brian loves him, so at least he's not neglected.  (I am trying, folks.)  He's still a bit of a rascal, and I'm hoping he calms down as he gets a little older.  On the plus side, he does kill/eat spiders, so he may prove to come in handy to this spider-detesting girl.

We finally purchased a new (used) car!  Brian's old deathtrap is finally a thing of the past.  He endured an entire winter without heat.  (Some days I forced him to drive my twenty-year old car which does have heat.)  We spent Christmas day pulling over on the side of the road to pour coolant into the car just so we could get home.  No more!  I know Brian feels good taking our new car to work, and I get to take it on the days I travel a good forty-five minutes or so to any of the major stores, such as Kohl's.

We also celebrated two years of marriage in August, and I am grateful everyday that I married my best friend.  I wouldn't trade him for anything.

Now, we look ahead.  Brian's birthday is next month, and then we have Thanksgiving, and a glorious Christmas to look forward to with our firstborn.  I am sad to see Brian go back to work, but I do look forward to the days ahead.

As for next summer?!  Caleb will be a year old, and we already have several activities planned.  We won't nearly be as limited as we were this summer.  We can't wait!