This is the hardest time of pregnancy, for sure and for certain. Wondering, waiting, and wondering some more. Is this twinge or that cramp the start of something?
So, I have two due dates for this pregnancy. One, the main one, based on my cycle, and the other, based on my first dating ultrasound. The dating ultrasound put our little girl's due date six days earlier than the one based on my cycle. In all of my ultrasounds, she's always been a little ahead of the game as far as weight, so perhaps the dating ultrasound due date is more accurate.
However, none of that is important to me, which is why I won't bother writing those dates here. Both of my boys were eight days late, so I don't put much stock in due dates. Caleb was seven days late when I was induced, and he was born the next day. Silas was eight days late all on his own.
I truly hope to not be that late. I really don't want to reach 41 weeks. My body has already shown a couple of signs of getting ready for labor, so we shall see. I don't want her to come this week, as I am only 37 weeks, and there are still some final touches of development in the brain. If I had to choose, I wouldn't mind 39 weeks.
But, absolutely none of this is in my control and it is out of my hands! We have readied the house, cleaned, decluttered, and prepared baby items for our girl, and done whatever we possibly can! We bought a new car the very end of November, because neither of our cars held three car seats. We made space in the corner of our room for baby clothes and other items, because this girl won't be getting her own room until we move some time in the future.
All I am doing now is continuing to keep up with my chores and daily baking, cooking, and cleaning. I am drinking plenty of water to make sure there is enough amniotic fluid, and I am gulping down Raspberry Leaf tea and capsules, which help prepare the uterus for labor. Mentally, I am trying to focus my mind on the great pain that awaits. Brian is preparing to take a paternity leave at work. Our hospital bags are packed, except for the last-minute toiletry items, and I made a list of those in case I completely forget my senses in a moment of panic while getting ready to head out.
This pregnancy has gone pretty smoothly, overall. I have felt just fine, for the most part. Any pregnant woman can complain of aches and pains, and I am no different. There's been nothing over the top, though. With Caleb, I fell once while pregnant. With Silas, I fell twice. So far- no falls! Watch, now that I've said that, I'll fall three times in the next hour! I had a very dramatic, slow-motion stumble down the front steps one day, that kept on going and going until I landed near the car, and while I came close to spraining my ankle, I came out unscathed. So praise God!
I've had to wear Brian's old winter coat, since I can actually zip his over my belly, and let me tell you how pretty I feel in that thing. Pregnancy is no time for vanity, however. I am wearing my sister's old maternity clothes, and many of the items are 13 years old, and they look it! But they have served us through 7 pregnancies now, and they are soon getting ready to retire for good. And I will gain an empty trunk that I can fill with other things. Yay!
So here we are... just waiting. Dreaming of our baby girl's face, fingers, and toes. Still in shock that this is actually happening. Standing on the brink of our family changing once again. Wondering how it is all going to look over the next few months, how the routines will change, how the boys will adjust.
Waiting for all my fears to fade as I behold our sweet little girl's face for the first time and I snuggle her close to me. She's worth it. I already know it. Without a doubt.
We love you, baby girl!
