Two nights ago, Brian came to bed late after a full day at school and an evening function as well. He came to our room a bit after midnight, to find me sitting up in our bed, nursing Silas in my lap, but I was hunched over him, asleep as well.
Sitting up with my baby in my lap, but asleep. I could have easily fallen off the bed, thus hurting us both.
He came over to me and asked, "Are you okay?" I was immediately startled, because I didn't hear him come in. I finished nursing Silas (fifteen minutes total, when I usually do ten each feed at night), and I put him down. He was still awake, and he proceeded to kick and make noise for who knows how long.
This was the second night of a really bad night for him. Instead of getting better, he was waking more and more, and many times, not even for nursing. He would make it til midnight, but then it would fall apart after that. Sometimes I nursed and he'd be up an hour later. Other times I offered to nurse, and he would not want it, and I would try to put him back down and he'd fuss like it was his number one job.
I had had enough.
It was time for drastic measures.
Since Silas is in our room, and no, it is not yet time to put the boys together, because sometimes Caleb wakes crying, and Silas is still up very early, etc., etc., etc., (one step at a time.) I decided Brian and I would camp out in the living room for several nights in order to reprogram Silas's waking and looking for me.
Since we share a room, it is awfully hard to ignore his crying. After an hour of crying, you'll pretty much do anything to make it stop, including run your head into a brick wall. (I have not done this, but if we had a brick wall, I may have.) Therefore, it was time to move to the living room.
For the past two nights, I have made beds for Brian and me on our couches in the living room. (This is a huge sacrifice by the way. I don't sleep well anywhere but a real bed.) When Silas woke up, I listened carefully on the monitor to make sure he was well, but I let him be. And I continued this for each time he woke up crying. I did not go in- get ready for this- until 4:30 both nights.
I read A LOT about baby sleep. Honestly, I know quite a bit. I am something of a encyclopedia of information. Everyone I talk to thinks Silas should sleep through the night at six months, but really, he is still allowed two feeds, and then that trickles down to one over the next couple of months, and by nine months a full attempt at night weaning should be tried. I always wanted to err on the side of caution. If he was hungry, I wanted to feed him.
However, my quality of life has been suffering greatly. I am exhausted. My wrist has endless pain from constantly lifting and lowering him from the pack n play all night. I came to the conclusion that if it is affecting me greatly, as his mother, it is affecting him, too. Frankly, he just needs to learn to sleep without all these wake ups, expecting someone to come in to help him. While I did ignore many of his cries before, I did not ignore all, and I am sure it sent a confusing message. Time to change that.
So, for the next several nights, until Silas stops waking up crying, Brian and I will be camping out in the living room, uncomfortable on the sofas. (Me especially on the short love seat.)
Anyone want to come by and join us? Bring some s'mores, please!
